Ask and Ye Shall Receive

A friend recently said to me “if you don’t ask the Universe for what you need, how will it know what to give you?” What a lovely sentiment. Six months ago I would have thought this existential tosh but since red plume has really started to take off, I’m learning that the Universe might actually be looking to help a girl out.

The wise friend in question is herself an example of the Universe doing its thang. Karen and I are Creatives and at the beginning of our venture were much more enthusiastic about getting stuck in with the writing than say, creating a business plan, or setting some goals – you know, little stuff like that. The business was starting to gather speed and we were loving life, all except for a teeny-weeny but very persistent voice in the back of our heads telling us that it was time we sit down and address the hard stuff. And it was hard. It felt like the “we need to talk” conversation of so many relationships and left me wanting to curl up in a corner and take a nap.

Then, with a sprinkle of fairy dust, into our lives walked Giselle of CherryBranch Consulting. She sat us down and with an array of brightly colored pens and intelligent questions, got us to start really thinking about what the future of red plume looks like. Don’t be fooled, that fairy dust and pleasant demeanor doesn’t mean you won't get grilled – you just won’t realize it until you’re finished and are flaked out wondering why you feel so spent. Giselle was exactly what we needed.

Another example of the Universe finding a square peg for our square hole came in the form of an SEO Queen. She started asking us strange technical questions about our website to which she received long...blank...stares. She ran a report for us and it turned out that our website, while stunning, is invisible to the Google Gods. In this instance we didn’t even know we needed help and wham! up it shows anyway. Now our website is going to be like catnip for those Google spiders, and it has even got me interested in becoming an SEO Queen myself – there’s room for plenty in this Kingdom.

What Karen and I didn’t realize was that in sucking it up and networking, which Biznik believes we should view as a community rather than a tool, we were asking the Universe for help. We were telling the world that our business was out there, and worth paying attention to; any help or advice greatly appreciated. If you have something the world should know about, but there’s something holding you back, just take a deep breath and plunge in. As long as you ask for help along the way and are receptive to it you’ll do just fine, and you’ll meet some awesome people along the way.

More "Food" Madness

Remember my lament a few weeks back about Uncrustables? The pre-made peanut-butter & jelly sandwich you can store in  your freezer? Well, now we have Candwiches, that's right, sandwiches in a can. You can't see me but I'm shaking my head.

Within the can you get a hot-dog bun and two sachets, one of peanut-butter, and one of jelly. The caveat is that you actually have to squeeze the peanut-butter and the jelly onto the bread yourself. What? "Harumph" is what I say. My only exertion of energy should be in popping open the can.

Where the Candwich beats out the Uncrustable is that:

• you don't need a freezer.
• It was created by a single, regular man, Mark Kirkland (well somewhat regular, he did put a sandwich in a can after all), not a huge corporation who we know to be completely lacking in regard for our health. 
• The name actually makes sense - I appreciate that.
• Oh, and with the PB&J Candwich you get a packet of taffy for dessert. So...more sugar then?

Despite all my incredulity towards the idea, I do admire Kirkland's noble belief that sandwiches in cans could be useful in disaster relief efforts. I really hope that's the case, I do. But I just can't help be turned off by the notion of a BBQ Chicken Candwich, because that's what's coming next folks, BBQ Chicken, BBQ Beef and Calzones. From a completely professional stand point I hope they are a success because I want to see how effective Kirkland's marketing campaign is, which involves his friend Jeff Pierson, telling anyone who's interested, "When it was just peanut-butter & jelly, I was pretty excited about it, but when I was handed my first meat sandwich I was a little hesitant. I thought, ‘How safe could this be?’ But I’ve eaten them after a full year, and they were still good — and I’m still here.”

Aww, it's kind if endearing, don't you think?

The Company You Keep

I’ve been grappling with some heavy business questions recently, the largest being, “What the hell should I be spending my time on?" That speaks to company direction, daily activity, overall goals, lots of big things. In some melodramatic moments, it seems too big to handle. I might curl up in the corner for a bit.

I shuffle over to the corner and find it already taken. Fear is scrunched so close to the wall, I almost didn’t see her there. Looks as if she’s been there a mighty long time and would continue to hog my corner. She shifted a bit to give me some room to scooch in.

That is not the company you want to keep. This was not the friend you envisioned having when you started our business. No, you envisioned out running with the bulls with Courage and climbing mountains with Determination (Dee for short). You guys would meet up for drinks with Confidence and Goals, and you’d play racquetball with Inspiration.

But here you are, paling around with Doubt and Negativity. And every time you hang out with them, you feel worse about yourself and the cycle continues.

What changed? How did your vision go awry? What defining moment switched your confident thoughts to doubt? You may have to dig deep to find the answers.

Once you have the answer, take a minute to figure our why its so paralyzing to you. Then tell yourself you can get past this. Because you can. You just have to believe you can. Once you do, you’ll know exactly how to tackle it and keep the momentum moving forward.

We will all have moments of doubt and pain. You’re allowed a bit of sympathy for yourself, but be kind. A lot of what we face every day as entrepreneurs is brand new and we’re still learning. Don’t beat yourself up over it, but be sure to get fired up from it. Onward!

Music to read by: Company I Keep by White Rabbits

Writing Tip: Avoid the Selfish Sermon

So it’s Tuesday. It’s my day to post something fantastic on our company blog. So here it is. Yup, this is it. I’m going to talk a little bit about something, expound upon it in the middle, then finish up with something witty or thought-provoking. It’s going to be a topic you’ll enjoy.

I’m now moving into the meat of the post. This is where it starts to get juicy. I’m not only making a good point, but I’m going to back it up with some solid facts or mind-blowing observations. I am 96.3% sure you will be intrigued, and will start considering passing this post along to your friends. You will keep reading.

Now closer to the end, I’m starting to wrap up the loose ends. Your questions have been answered and you are walking away richer than when you started reading. It was a great visit and you learned a lot about me.

Or did you?

You, in fact, got nothing more out of this than fluff. As the writer, you envisioned a Jedi mind trick, willing the audience to be excited about you, but that’s not the result. You actually ended up with the Selfish Sermon, a name I made up this very moment.

The Selfish Sermon includes three bad habits:
~ describing a process when not meant to be a How To
~ using “I” over and over
~ telling people how to feel

Avoid these pitfalls if you want to connect with your audience through your writing, on your website, your blog, a brochure, anywhere. Just a few simple alterations, and the Selfish Sermon becomes the start of a conversation.

Let’s use an example for illustration – an excerpt from the website of a massage therapist:

“First I choose a fragrant oil based on your preferences and massage it into the back, shoulders and arms. After a few minutes, I take warm rocks and use them to massage key tension points of the same area. After 15 minutes, I use more warm rocks and lay them along the spine. Once the heat is gone, I remove the rocks, finish with some gentle pressure, and allow you to reflect with soothing music. You will be at your most relaxed”

Instead of describing the process → describe the benefits
Process is factual, results are emotional. What compels a person to get off your website and onto the phone with you is what you can do for them. How can you improve their current state? The question is not how exactly, in what steps, will you improve their state. It’s a question of how will they feel different after working with you? And how is your help different from another provider’s help? Describe results, not a process.

Original:
“First I choose a fragrant oil based on your preferences and massage it into the back, shoulders and arms.”

Refreshed:
“We use organic fragrant oils during your massage, gentle on the skin and relaxing to the senses.”


Instead of using “I” → focus on the reader
Yes, it is your company. Yes, you are the one providing a service. But you are selling it for THEM, your audience. Involve them in your writing or you’ll be talking to yourself.

Original:
“After a few minutes, I take warm rocks and use them to massage key tension points of the same area. After 15 minutes, I use more warm rocks and lay them along the spine.”

Refreshed:
“After a few minutes, we start working with warm rocks, erasing pain and stiffness by massaging the key tension points of your back and neck. The spine is then treated to lasting relief as the rocks are placed along key points to bathe the tired muscles in warmth.”


Instead of describing a feeling → create a feeling
The first two points are building an emotional reaction in the audience. Now is not the time to break that. This step is a bit trickier, but your goal is to think of the things picked up by the senses and relate them to the end result. In the case of a massage therapist, there is touch, smell, and sound, but all combined equal extreme relaxation and comfort.

Original:
“Once the heat is gone, I remove the rocks, finish with some gentle pressure, and allow you to reflect with soothing music. You will be at your most relaxed.”

Refreshed:
“As you drift into deep relaxation, the last gentle touches remind your body to let go of its lingering tension. Lay as long as you need, reflecting on the serenity in your muscles and mind.”


Granted, this is not my best writing, and it is easier to refresh text as a whole rather than sentence by sentence. But it does its job - illustrate ways to avoid the Selfish Sermon. Focus on the benefits for the customer, how your product or service applies to your client’s life, and create a genuine connection.

The World's Largest Gummy Bear

Both Rebecca and I like gummy bears. Preferably Haribo, if you’re keeping notes. But even we are not sure if we could handle a five-pound gummy bear.

This is the invention of the inventive people over at Vat19. It comes in your choice of colors and flavors. It is the equivalent of 1,400 regular gummy bears. That is a lot of gummy anything.

But I kind of want one, and this seems to be a result of watching their funny promotional video. (See, marketing does work!) The video does address the problematic questions of, “Is this really TOO much gummy bear to eat?” and goes on to explain why it is so awesome. It’s funny and creative.

Maybe I just gave you the best idea for a birthday gift, but at the very least, you’ll get a laugh out of their video. Happy Week!

Ally - Frustrating Kids Since 2009

Judging from some message boards (yes, message boards dedicated to commercials do exist) the Ally commercials cause some contention. A lot of people complain about how much they would like to punch the grown-up in the face – I think that’s kind of the point. Some people say it makes them feel so bad for the children – erm, like I said…

I personally think they’re great. At least I think they’re funny, I’m undecided as to how effective they are.

Normally I intensely dislike commercials with children in them, and I generally like children. They’re saccharin sweet and boring. I particularly dislike any that focus on a child’s success in the bathroom. I know it must be awesome when your kid finally learns how to take themselves to the bathroom rather than presenting it to you in a diaper, but still, the jumps of joy and slow-motion grins belie the fact that there’s going to be a mess for you to clean up in the bathroom anyway, at least for the next few years. I don’t like the googly, sweet way children speak in commercials – the acting is so, so bad, which is understandable, given that they’re toddlers and have yet to grasp the nuances of true character acting, dahling.

The reason I like the children in the Ally commercials is simply because they’re not acting. Or if they are, blow me down with a feather and hand them each an Oscar, because it’s great. Their emotions are simple ones - pleasure, surprise, frustration, disappointment, confusion – and they wear them so clearly on their faces. There are no dead eyes here. What a difference to those kids who sing with delight that the adhesive on their band-aids works. I highly doubt that is a top priority for three-year-olds.

Despite being all grown up (supposedly) I can completely relate to the Ally kids. Even though I should be thinking “where the hell would I put it?” about the real life pony, I’d still be mad about not getting offered it at all. And I love the brutal honesty of the boy who is given the shiny red truck to play with only to have it swapped for a cardboard cutout two seconds later. “It’s a piece of junk! I want the red truck.” Ahh, if only social etiquette didn’t stop me expressing my feelings so honestly every time I was presented with a piece of junk.

Yet, despite my clear enjoyment of the commercials, which I think the Germans refer to as schadenfreude, and even though I've mentioned "Ally" a dozen times in this post (you're welcome), I couldn't remember what the bank's name was without looking it up, in fact I wasn't even certain it was a bank. It is a bank right? I suppose that I wanted to blog about them lends something to the effectiveness of the commercials, but if I had been walking down the street and suddenly thought, "I must open a checking account," as you do, I wouldn't have considered anyone who didn't have a storefront to remind me of their existence.

Anyway, what's your take on the commercials? Love ‘em or hate ‘em?

Class in Defeat

We recently did a short test run of two online Customer Relationship Management (CRM) systems in the hopes of falling in love with one. We fell in like with one and feeling that was enough, said farewell to the other. We have no regrets. Well, maybe a bit of regret, based only on what happened right AFTER the sale.

We cancelled our subscription with Highrise. It is a smart, beautiful service that for us, was a bit expensive and did not offer the breadth of what we’d like (unlimited contacts, room to grow, a calendar). So I log in to the system to cancel and thankfully find the cancellation button in a very obvious place. It is preceded by a short sentence that started, “We’d hate to see you go…” That’s so nice. I confirm I do indeed want to cancel and the next new page again mentions how they would hate to see us go, and more nice things. I find this endearing.

Once the cancellation is done, a new page pops up confirming the cancellation. How often do you cancel something online, and nothing confirms, so you are nervously stuck not knowing if it actually happened? And then for them to be this nice?

In thanks for being them being so responsive, I went for the exit survey. I strongly believe in the power of feedback. The company asked a few simple questions about why we were leaving and the last box told us to be completely honest. Refreshing. I did tell them their competitor won out on price and breadth, but we appreciated our nice experience with Highrise. Upon clicking “Submit,” a new screen popped up.

“Thanks again for taking the time to give us your feedback. We're sorry to see you go, but we'll be here if you ever want to try us again. We wish you success in whatever you're working on.”

A few simple words was all it took to make me a fan. A fan that doesn’t even use their product. I appreciate that kind of thought in the fast-moving online world, especially when a sale is NOT made.

Compare that to Salesforce, who did make the sale with us. From the beginning, it was obvious they prefer a more hardline approach to sales. Obvious from the numerous phone calls and emails I received within the seven days of our trial. It’s nice that they wanted us as a customer but it was a bit much. And once they did have our credit card information, do you know what we got in return? A form letter (email) that was an order confirmation. It started with “Dear Karen Hancock, Order #78257305 was activated on…” Warm and fuzzy. We had to scour the entire thing for a thank you, and it came in the bland form of “Thank you for your business.”

Both companies made a conscious choice in how their communications reflect their personality. In other words, Salesforce is like a car salesman and 37 Signals is your neighborhood coffee barista. Only time will tell if the car salesman makes good on his promises but right now, the coffee guy holds a warm spot in my heart.